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Thursday, December 23, 2010

Stomach Flu...I HATE YOU!

It's official. I've had my first ever stomach flu. And all I can say is that I'm not a fan...at all! It is true I went a whole 25 years without getting this lovely bug, and I'd sure as heck like to go another 25 without ever having it again. By far my least favorite bug.

It all started on Sunday while working. I had my lunch and about 30 minutes later my stomach started to turn. I tried to breath through it but I ended up in the bathroom with diarrhea 10 minutes later. I had that lovely stuff about 4 times in 30 minutes. Of course this was during the busy part of the afternoon at work and about every 5 minutes I had to sit down because I was getting dizzy and felt as though I could throw up. Well needless to say about 45 minutes later I had vomited EVERYWHERE in the bathroom. I don't remember the last time I threw up (non alcohol related). I immediately had to go home. I packed up my stuff and barely made it the 25 minute drive home before I ended up with more diarrhea AND vomit. This seesaw went on for about 4 hours. I was miserable.

The worst part of all of this was that I was home alone. Anyone who knows me, knows that when I'm sick I really should have someone home with me because if I'm running a fever, there is no telling what my body will do. Most of the time I pass out with little or no warning. I had major anxiety because I was in fact feeling dizzy and whoozy while running the short 20 feet from my bed to the toilet. And not to mention with all the fluids I was losing it was only adding to the anxiety. To make matters worse there was no one who could be home to just "watch" me. My mom was in Chicago with her mom, Dad was with his mom, Nikk was in Bloomington with her boyfriend, Stace was at work and so was Adam. The part that caused me the most anxiety is that you just never know what my body will do. So I grabbed a towel off the shower door and covered my self up and tried to sleep on the bathroom floor to be cautious.

At about 8 I had had enough and called Adam at work, he luckily had been cut(he's a waiter) and I told him to pick me up 7up and something for my diarrhea and nausea(I finally had stopped vomiting). After 2 rounds of pepto I was able to just lay for a few hours and sleep.
Mom came over monday night and I had a few crackers and felt nauseous so I stuck with my ginger ale. And tried to stick to the lovely and wonderful BRAT diet.
Finally on Wednesday I had a yogurt and still didn't feel great so I backed off again for a while. Wednesday night I was feeling a little better so I tried chic-fil-a and actually felt pretty good, I felt queezy but nothing i couldn't manage.

All in all, I'm still not feeling great. I definately feel better than I had, but I'm not 100%. In fact a cookie I just had made me nauseous. This really is NO FUN! But through it all I have to say my love for my husband has definately grown. In our 5 years together he has never had to take care of me. I've had sinus infections and respiratory issues but he's never had to actually take care of me. Through this he was AMAZING! so sweet and attentive to everything I needed. He's a true gem! LOVE him so much
Hopefully since tomorrow is Christmas eve I will be able to enjoy some of my favorite foods such as Grandma's frozen fruit salad and Ice Box cookies, but I'm betting not :( Which sucks but at least I'm on the upswing and even better is that this didn't happen last week during finals or later in the week so I'd be sick on Christmas.

But Now that I've had this Stomach Flu, I'd rather not have it again! It can stay clear of this body cause it was NO FUN!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

And then there were 2

Well it's official I AM DONE with the semester!!! I finished last Wednesday with my two finals. The first final was early in the morning and went fairly well especially after the 12 point curve we got! YES! The second final was a take home and wasn't too bad. After all of that I just wanted to sleep so I went bed early and then Adam and I hosted my nursing school christmas party. We spent all of thursday cleaning the house and making appetizers. It was nice to have Adam off work because I honestly don't know how I would have been able to get everything done with out him. I have such an AMAZING husband! :)
The party was a success and it was nice to spend time with my amazing nursing school friends without the pressures of feeling like we had to study!! Then for me it was off to 3 days of work. No rest for this one! (hence part of the reason it's taken me so long to blog)

I have to say I am beyond thrilled that this semester is over. It has been the most challenging 4 months I've ever had to go through. As Adam says it has taught me suffering and humility. And I have to say Got the message LOUD AND CLEAR! It has been such a struggle to even pass these classes which had  NEVER been a problem for me before,  then on top of it having one of the worst clinical instructors ever didn't help. But I've made it through and I'm a stronger person because of it. I learned a lot about who I am as a person and what I am able to handle. While it wasn't easy and at times I thought I might fail out, I'm glad I went through it all because it has made me a stronger version of myself.

So now we are down to just 2 more semesters. Boy does that sound nice! Graduation is only about 8 months away and Adam and I are counting them down! We are excited for the next chapter of our lives and for me after 20 years in school I'm excited to move on and hopefully start that family I'm dying to have!! I know that one way or another Adam and I will be parents and we are so excited to start that journey.

Here's to only 2 more semesters!! Salude!

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Update!

It's been a while since I've posted, and thats because I've been so crazy busy. First of all Pediatrics is done! I studied my little booty off for weeks and passed by a mere .6% but passing is passing and that is all that matters. It was just a rather stressful time and at the end of the day the last thing I wanted to do was talk to anyone let alone blog. But I passed and have moved on to Med/Surg II. YIPPY!
Med/Surg was going much better. The program I am in seemed to take what we had to say to heart and changed the way they were doing lectures. In fact I listened to the lectures for the first exam and did some of the reading as a supplement and did well. In fact the class average was a 85%. We were all feeling pretty good about this class. Then we took our second exam last friday and the class average was a 72%. I mean hoenstly!!! how do you do that???? it was sooo frustrating. Everytime I go into the first exam not exactly knowing what to expect, then based on the first exam's results I continue to study or adjust my studying accordingly. Well that whole idea proved to be a big mistake! but she ended up curving it a little, and I'm still doing just fine in the class. Just a little frustrating

So for the clinical portion of this med/surg class I'm down at St. Francis Hospital in Beech Grove. I volunteered to go down there becasue it really is only 5 more miles from my house. So far its been ok. I'm not really a fan of the unit (oncology) and most of the nurses aren't overly student friendly. But our instructor is super nice and laid back which is nice. The thing that bugs me the most is that the unit typically only has about 8 pts and most go home early in the morning so its a lot of down time with not a lot of learning experience in there. It makes for an easy clinical day but I once again don't feel like I'm getting the best experience. I now officially want to work on the med/surg floor I currenly work on as a tech once I finish because I just want the experience to feel comfortable doing any other sort of nursing.

Also a couple of weeks ago Adam and I went to dinner with some friends for one of our friends Birthday. We had gone shopping to Edinburg to get some Christmas shopping out of the way, on our way back we were talking about how the girl we were going to dinner to celebrate for, her and her husband had been trying to get pregnant for a few months now. I told him to watch to see if she was drinking and as soon as he sat down at the dinner table he turned to me and wispered..."shes not drinking". Well we waited and her husband announced that they are pregnant and are due May 23!! I'm sooo excited for them! They are such a wonderful and deserving couple and I hope this baby is healthy and happy!
So we now have several friends who are pregnant and we are just dying to be able to join in this exclusive club! Its a struggle daily for Adam and I, one that has sparked many fits of tears and anguish (ok thats all me) but it's important for people especially our friends who are pregnant that none of this takes away from how excited we are for them and their expanding families. We are just so anxious to start the process!

On a high note, I'm offically 9 months away from being done with nursing school and I couldn't be happier about it. And NO we aren't planning to get pregnant any time in the near near future but we are looking forward to 2011 so that we can begin to try. But we just have to keep in mind that I have to be able to get through school before we can go down that road.
So thats the update on our lives for the past month. I'll post more soon, especially after Thanksgiving tomorow. But until then I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving and hope that all travels are safe!
God Bless,

Monday, November 1, 2010

Answered Prayers

I had my 4th Peds exam today and I'm proud to announce that I PASSED!!!! I even passed before she would curve it (that like seriously never happens). ALSO the grade was high enough to bring my overall grade up to a passing one!!!
So I just want to thank everyone for their prayers because they have been answered!!! I'm so pleased with my test today!! However, I do have the final on Friday, so please keep those prayers coming for me!!! Only 4 more days for this drama to be over. Thank you everyone. I seriously can't thank you all enough! I know by the grace of God and your wonderful prayers I did well!
Forever thankful!

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

"Loser"

Ok so my new attitude on school isn't 100% perfected yet. I'm having a low moment and in that low moment my itunes started to play one of my favorites. It started playing Loser by 3DD. This pretty much sums up how I feel right about now. This nursing program is sucking the life out of me, and making me question whether or not it's worth it anymore. As well as trying to decide whether or not God is trying to tell me something. I've never failed anything in my life and I'm in real jeopardy of failing out of school...I know it's not my job to understand why God challenges me, but I'm struggling with this at the moment. However, 3DD has a way of making me feel better once again! Love me some 3DD!!


Loser
3 Doors Down


Breathe in right away. 
Nothing seems to fill this place. 

I need this everytime 
So take your lies, get off my case. 
Someday I will find 
A love that flows through me like this 
This will fall away, this will fall away. 

You're getting closer 
To pushing me off of life's little edge 
'Cause I'm a loser 
And sooner or later you know I'll be dead 
You're getting closer 
You're holding the rope and I'm taking the fall 
'Cause I'm a loser, I'm a loser, yeah. 

This is getting old. 
I can't break these chains that I hold 
My body's growing cold 
There's nothing left of this mind or my soul. 
Addiction needs a pacifier, the buzz of this poison is taking me higher. 
This will fall away, this will fall away. 

You're getting closer 
To pushing me off of life's little edge. 
'Cause I'm a loser 
And sooner or later you know I'll be dead. 
You're getting closer 
You're holding the rope and I'm taking the fall 
'Cause I'm a loser 
I'm a loser! 

You're getting closer 
To pushing me off of life's little edge. 
'Cause I'm a loser 
And sooner or later you know I'll be dead. 
You're getting closer 
You're holding the rope and I'm taking the fall. 
'Cause I'm a loser 

You're getting closer 
To pushing me off of life's little edge 
'Cause I'm a loser 
And sooner or later you know I'll be dead. 
You're getting closer 
You're holding the rope and I'm taking the fall. 
'Cause I'm a loser. 


Ok now back to studying, I feel better just listening to them! Thats why the rock!!! :) The new and improved attitude is on track once again... a few slip ups once and again isn't all bad right??

Monday, October 25, 2010

I've Got a New Attitude

I had my 3rd Peds test about 2 hours ago and lets just say it left little to be desired. I am no longer passing, granted through my calculations I need just a 4 point curve to be passing, I just hate depending on that.

However, I refuse to complain anymore. My frustrations with this program go deep and if it weren't for the amount of money I had invested in this education(and the fact that the end so near) I would walk away and find a program that is actually established and worth the money that it costs and that I actually get something out of other than frustration. I feel like crying every second of every day due to the mere frustration and all I can say is "I JUST DON'T GET IT". I'm tired of fighting every person in this program for what I feel is right. I just wish that people would stop looking out for themselves and actually have a moral ground to stand on and do what is morally right. (this is a whole other topic) 

However, instead of complaining I've decided (in my 20 min ride home) to take a different approach. God is challenging me for reasons I don't quite understand but that understanding is not for me to know. I need to grow from this experience and become a better person because of it. I will continue with my sufferings and offer them up to Jesus who suffered for me. These few months of suffering are nothing compared to what God has endured on my behalf. This is the least of what I owe him. I trust in his plan (well most of the time) and need to focus on what is good in my life instead of constantly looking over my shoulder to those who have what I want. 

I will stop trying to control my life and everything in it (Darn grandma and her type A personality) and have pure trust in what God has in store for me. I can only work within my own limitations and the rest is up to God. I will work hard to get to where I believe I'm supposed to go, but if not then once again trust in God's plan for me. 
God is ever present and will point me in the right direction. I trust in Him and surrender to His will

Saturday, October 23, 2010

"It's Not My Time"

I'm not one who enjoys complaining, but it seems like lately that's all I do. To be honest it stems from not being fully happy with my life. I love my husband and friends and family. Best of all I have a growing relationship with God and while that should all be enough it just doesn't seem to be for me. I'm almost embarrassed to even say that I'm unhappy because I have so much more going for me than a lot of people and I need to focus on this. I need to focus on the good in my life and not what I don't have. 

I'm a HUGE 3 doors down fan. They are by far and above my favorite band out there. I listen to them almost daily. This song is from their latest release (2008) and I think the chorus fits for me. This life that I'm leading is not over, it's not my time. I often feel that nursing school will be the death of me, and considering I'm not doing overly well in Peds right now, that truth has come more to the surface for me. Soooo here is my anthem for the next 10 months. Nursing school will not be the death of me and I will get to live the life I've always dreamed eventually, it's just Not my Time right now, and I have to learn to have piece with that. Sooo here are the lyrics to one of my FAVORITE songs ever....



"It's Not My Time"

Looking back at the beginning of this
And how life was
Just you and me loving all of our friends
Living life like an ocean
But now the current's only pulling me down
It’s getting harder too breath
It won’t be to long and I will be going under
Can you save me from this?

Cause it’s not my time I'm not going
There's a fear in me it’s not showing
This could be the end of me
And everything I know
Oh but I won’t go

I look ahead to all the plans that we made
And the dreams that we had
I'm in a world that tries to take them away
Oh but I'm taking them back
Cause all of this time I've just been too blind to understand
What should matter to me
My friends this life we live, it’s not what we have
It’s what we believe in

Cause it’s not my time I'm not going
There's a fear in me but it’s not showing
This could be the end of me
And everything I know
But it’s not my time I'm not going
There's a will in me and now I know that
This could be the end of me
And everything I know
Oh but I won’t go
I won’t go

There might be more than you believe
(There might be more than you believe)
There might be more than you can see

But it’s not my time I'm not going
There's a fear in me it’s not showing
This could be the end of me
And everything I know
But it’s not my time I'm not going
There's a will in me and now it’s gonna show
This could be the end of me
And everything I know
Oh

There might be more than you believe
(There might be more than you believe)
There might be more than you can see

But I won’t go
No I won’t go down
Yeah 


Love me some 3DD...thanks for the inspiration!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

PEDIATRICS is hard

I realize it's been a while since I've blogged, and it's mainly due to the fact that I've been super busy with this Pediatrics rotation.
As it turn out my instructor was worse on paper than in person. In fact, in person, she's awesome and I've learned so much from her. So lets play a little catch up.
I love the clinical portion of this rotation. We are at Peyton Manning Children's Hospital (PMCH) and it's so awesome. The nurses are so nice, and so welcoming to students. It's a very laid back atmosphere, which makes sense since you are dealing with kids. The patient population ranges anywhere from 2-3 days old, to 17 years of age. The saddest part is knowing that these kids are missing out on so much by being in the hospital for months at a time.

During this rotation I've been able to give my first IV meds, give my first meds through an NG tube (it's a tube that goes in through your nose to your stomach) and see a wound vac changed. Needless to say it's been a great nursing experience! I always knew that Peds was an option for me, but it's been nice to get first hand experience. In fact in deciding to go back to school for nursing I had taken a couple of vacation days from my job to shadow a nurse at PMCH on their medical unit as well as their PICU(pediatric intensive care unit). I liked both of these so much that I decided to bite the bullet and go for another 3-4 years of schooling to get my nursing degree.

While the clinical portion of this rotation rocks, the didactic portion leaves little to be desired. I am just struggling as a whole with how these "teachers" are ok with and feel like they are worth the money we are paying for these classes when all they do it answer emails. The way this online thing is set up is that, we have modules that we have to complete, most classes are set up so that if the class was a full semester we would have one module to complete every week, but being that it's an accelerated class we have anywhere from 5-8 to do in one week. Each module has at least 1 chapter to read, a discussion board posting and review activities. In previous classes these modules also contained your audio lecture with notes that you were able to follow. However for these last two rotations there has been nothing. Basically these teachers just say "here's 8 modules with 8 different chapters to read totally about 370 pages worth of information to read in one week with absolutely no guidance from me." We get minimal notes(they have a few bullet points on each slide), and no "study guide" to help us while we study. Pretty much BS if you ask me. If I were an online instructor, I would try to take a little more pride in my work and help the students as much as possible. When you think about it, being an online teacher seems like a dream job, and in reality it really is. There is a lot of initial work involved but once you've recorded your lectures, made your exams, and made your notes, it is set up so that most of the work is already done for you. However the problem is that these "teachers" haven't made taken the time to get the course going.

My frustration lies with this fact. To me it's just PURE laziness that you can't take the time to make sure you're students have everything they need to succeed. I'm not asking for you to hold my hand and give me spoon feed me everything, I mean I realize that some things need to be done on my own. But lectures and a guide for what we need to focus our studying on when you have almost 400 pages worth of information would be nice. I mean talking to some people about nursing school, they will say that they rarely used their books but went to lecture everyday and passed their classes. Seem a little off?????
My even bigger pet peeve is that when you talk to anyone about it, their excuse is "well the NCLEX is just like this". GIVE ME A FREAKING BREAK, you have to get me through nursing school before I EVER have to worry about the stinking NCLEX. You've GOT to be kidding me if you think this is ok. I mean what the H are these "teachers" being paid for? If you're going to have a program where everything is self taught, why the H am I spending $12,000 a semester for your institution? (woooosaaaahhhh)

Consequently since I'm a terrible reader and learn best by audio or visual means my exam grades have been less than good. I was able to prove to my instructor that one question was wrong and get points back so I'm sitting at a little bit more comfortable grade but I'm still frustrated. To be honest if I hadn't spent a crap ton of money already on this program and wasn't almost half way through, I'd quit and find a different program. They say they are working on improving this program but honestly I think they are just blowing sunshine up my rear. Because when you go in to talk to their new clinical coordinator she tries to make it about me and saying that maybe I'm not cut out for online classes. I wanted to scream at her and tell her that I've taken 10 online classes prior to this and never got lower than a 94 in those classes and one of them was chemistry, so kiss my rear! The previous online classes all had lectures, notes and discussions that actually aided in my studying instead of creating extra BS I didn't need.

Ok I'm off my soap box, but man do I feel better. Well the next exam is next Monday so if any of you have an spare time around 9am that day, please say some extra prayers for me. I need all the help I can get!
much love,

Friday, October 8, 2010

Sadie Bug is 2...wow!

My precious Sadie bug turned 2 yesterday. WOWO! I can't believe my little fluffernuffer is 2. Sadie truly helps make my life more interesting.
Sadie entered our lives officially 2 years ago, but the idea of her began about 3.5 years ago. When Adam and I first met, all he wanted was a German Shepherd. I was never really a fan of that breed of dog. I mean I never found them cute and cuddly and all. I thought they were ugly and not much fun.
Adam and I went to see I Am Legend a couple years ago, and there was a German Shepherd in that movie that was so cool. That was the first time I began to come around to the idea of having a German Shepherd. So Adam and I decided that once we got married we would get his German Shepherd. We decided to wait until we would buy a house so the dog would be able to have a hard and more room to run around and play. We also decided that since I wasn't much of a fan of the German Shepherds we could get an all black one and I'd be ok with that.
In talking with some family friends, I found this guy who was a German Shepherd breeder. So one day in July I finally made my way over to this guys business (he owns a dog training place in Fishers) and put my down payment on a dog. I told them I would like to have an all black female. They told me they only had one Mom pregnant at the moment and they wouldn't produce an all black puppy. It would be at least a year until they got any all black puppies. So I called Adam and he said he didn't care and he just wanted the dog. So I reluctantly put my $250 deposit down for the dog I didn't really want.
At the end of September we got a call saying it would be soon when the puppies would arrive and they would call us to come meet them. On October 7, 2008 Sadie was born. We were told it would be a few weeks till we could pick her out but we should come as often as possible to get to know the puppies.
We eventually were able to pick out Sadie, it was a tough decision since we were 2nd to last to pick a girl, but we did it, and we patiently waited to bring her home.
On December 5, 2008 we finally got to bring the newest member of our family home.

 She joined big sister Kacie and the two quickly become BFF!

Now Sadie was quite different from her sister. Sadie had a bad bout of diarrhea for the first 2 months of her life. Everyday when Adam and I got home Sadie was COVERED in poop! She got a bath DAILY. It was aweful. I was taking her to the vet almost every other day and at $200 each time, things started to add up. I was getting really annoyed. I was actually almost ready to get rid of her! Finally one day in January, we went out for my cousins birthday and it was 3 AM when we got home and Sadie had the worst blow out ever. She was covered in poop, it was all over my walls, all over my floor and and on the carpet (how so much poop came out of a tiny thing I'll never know).  But I decided I would bathe her and it was at that moment I fell in love. She looked at me, soaking wet, and just melted my heart, it was as though she said "mommy I'm sorry, please don't hate me".

Well as it turns out, Sadie developed IBS. (yes Irritable Bowel Syndrome in a DOG!!!) So we put her on a special food and from that day forward she was cured. She had no more issues, unless she got a hold of something she shouldn't (i mean if she ate certain treats, or got a hold of a towel, or whatever it would open the flood gates ::frustrating::)
But in time we figured it out and this year we were finally able to put her and Kacie on the same food (talk about a reduction in our food costs!!!).
So 2 years later and I'm completely in love with my Sadie bug. I often call her my toddler. She is stubborn as you'll ever see. I still sometimes have to walk outside to tell her to pee because she is just that stubborn. But she is fun and brings a smile to my face daily. I love when she tries to crawl up my chest so she can nuzzle my neck and just be close to me. She shows affection only on her terms and often acts like a teenager in front of her friends. But I have fun torturing her and playing with her.
She's an amazing dog, and I'm glad Adam "forced" me to get her. She has been a great addition to our little family. and Kacie and Sadie are completely inseparable. When one is gone doing something, the other is completely distraught over the fact that the other is missing. But I love her to pieces and she truly is an amazing dog!
Sadie Bug I LOVE you and Happy 2nd Birthday!

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Jenny, you CRAZY!

Yesterday Oprah had Jenny McCarthy on. I'm not a huge Oprah fan because often times she is on this whole other level that I just don't quite get, and others times I just like the news stories she presents.
Well yesterday was a WTF moment for me. Jenny McCarthy was on to talk about her break up with Jim Carey. For me her ideals of what goes on in a relationship is F*ed up and no wonder she is almost 40 and not married or in a committed relationship and no wonder it didn't work out. 

Oprah asked her "when did you know it was over?" her response, when it wasn't fun anymore...News flash my dear, life isn't always fun! In fact many times it freaking sucks and I want to throw in the towel too, but my love for my husband means more to me than anything and you have to work through the difficult times. Then she goes on to say that you can "honor the lessons learned and the timing of knowing that a relationship is over instead of staying in a relationship that doesn't work for 30+ years like a lot our parents did". I just think that was a bogus statement and I'll leave it as that. 
Another things Oprah asked was "Did you think you were going to go the distance with him" her response was, that she may have on a subconscious level known that they wouldn't work because she never sold her house when they moved in together. Once I again I want to hit her and say, HOW DO YOU EXPECT IT TO BE FOREVER IF YOU DON'T GIVE ALL OF YOURSELF TO SOMEONE??? I mean seriously, if you have the ability to easily walk away then you probably won't work hard to make it work. I don't know what the exact statistic is but they say that those couples who live together before an engagement often times don't work out because although you make act like you're in a committed relationship, they still feel like they can leave. I also know that there is an absurd statistic that says those couples who live together before marriage have a higher divorce rate and it was correlated with the fact that they never quite get past that whole feeling as though they could leave at any moment. In fact I was talking to a co-worker about this issue the other day, when I asked after she had been married, if it felt any different from before since they had lived together. She said the only difference was that they both kind of brought up issues they had more since they both knew that this was forever. I thought this was great insight because that's what couples need to go the distance!
But then Oprah goes on to say that it was great advice to keep your stuff, your bank accounts, and make your own money...this just further reiterates my point... NO WONDER THEY ARE STILL SINGLE!
Now I have to say, there is NOTHING wrong with being single. 

Next she asks "did you think this was the love of your life?" her response was that she learned that she doesn't have to have a lover to have love in her life...which I agree with, but then she says she thinks she is the love of her life...WTF...another example of just being on a totally different playing field than me because that sounds bogus as well!

And Lastly Jenny says that the line that Tom Cruise had said in some movie "you complete me" was a complete fallacy. I once again don't agree. Adam completes me in many ways. I'm not perfect and I have a lot of growing to do, which he helps me to achieve. He is my rock and my companion and my life partner and together we are completed because we compliment each other very well, we both help each other grow and become better people. I just don't feel like you can rely on yourself for everything. At some point you have to lean on someone else, not necessarily completely but at the very least a little!

One thing that I did like, was that in her grieving she was all about learning the lessons from her relationship. I think that is a very good point because in every experience you have you learn something, especially when it comes to relationships. I may not have this long list of ex's ::thankgoodness: but I learned a lot about what I wanted and who I wanted to be myself. 

But anyways more power to miss Jenny McCarthy, for becoming a stronger individual after her breakup, of which she seemed to have done in a very healthy way but your views on this stuff are crazy and I don't agree with you on this one my dear!

Monday, September 27, 2010

Bye Bye Gary

I'm a car girl at heart. I love cars and even more so trucks! I'm no car expert or anything but they are so cool, every year my dad and I go to the car show down at the convention center and I honestly enjoy myself. Looking at all the new models, and how they've changed different features from year to year. I just get such a kick out of it. It's a fun hobby to try learn about the different cars.
For me in my immature state of being 20 years old the kind of car a guy drove played a big part in his appeal to me(immature and stupid right?). And if they drove a Ford, I was completely turned off and I paid no attention. (I hate Ford vehicles! I'm a Chevy girl and you can't like both!) So in looking for Mr. Right, they totally would gain points if they drove a cool car, especially a truck.  When Adam and I first met, he drove a company vehicle and I didn't know what kind of vehicle was his personal vehicle. But on his last day he drove his truck(it was a GMC ::jackpot!::). I was immediately in love. Plus Adam just looked so darn Hot driving it :)

The reason I'm "saying" all of this is because last thursday we had to get rid of his beloved truck. Adam had purchased this truck back in 2000, it was his first big purchase and was a great second truck for him. All that ever went wrong with it, was 2 alternators and a fuel pump(that was extremely expensive right before the wedding!) So all and all it was an Awesome truck! I affectionately named the truck Gary a few years back because I felt Gary was a good strong name, solid, just like his truck.
Shortly after getting married Adam was wanting a new truck. He wanted a diesel, I said I was cool with it so long as it wasn't a Ford! lol. We decided to use our first time homebuyers credit towards a new truck. However shortly after we got married I decided to go back to school and our income was severely cut almost in half and we realized we couldn't afford a car payment. So it was just an exasperating search for Adam that he did almost every night, but he couldn't find one for under $17,000 and we just couldn't afford that. But Gary was increasingly becoming more of a challenge to drive and I honestly didn't feel safe driving it, I felt like it was going to fall apart every time I stepped on the gas. But I still enjoyed it, (other than in the 90+ degree heat because the AC was broke!!)
Two weeks ago one of Adam's good friends let him know that his company was selling a 1998 Dodge Diesel Dually and if we "traded" our truck in, it was within our price range! So we drove down to Vincennes 2 weekends ago to look at the truck and let Will look at our truck and lets face it, I immediately fell in love! It was a beauty! The only problem was there was a small leak somewhere, so we told Will if he fixed the leak he had a deal, he agreed and I began to stress.
I knew that getting rid of Adam's truck was a must because on our way from Vincennes that weekend,  Gary hit the coveted 170,000 mile mark...

and I just knew that with all the work we would have to put into Gary in order for me to feel comfortable Adam driving one more winter with him, it was just not feasible (He needed new Wheel bearings, shocks, a new windshield, new side mirrors, new AC, and the 4 wheel drive was broke...all in all it would be about 3-4 thousand ::gulp::). And not to mention the transmission would probably go out any day with 170,000 miles. So I knew it was important and much needed for Adam to get a new truck and how could we pass up such a deal, from someone we knew and trusted???

So apparently LONG story short, last Thursday Will came up to Indy and Adam and Will traded vehicles. This was a very emotional day for me. I cried a few times (pathetic I know). but for me Gary represented Adam and I. We fell in love in that truck. He picked me up on our first dates in that truck, our first kiss was in that truck and it represented an easier and fun time. Every time I got into Gary it brought back all those first fun moments and the butterflies when Adam first held my hand, and first kissed me goodnight or goodbye after an amazing weekend together. So needless to say my annoying sentimental part of me was really sad to let Gary go. I still to this day don't love the fact that we had to get rid of him.  Gary I miss you very much!

So we added a new really awesome truck to our family...it's loud, and it's HUGE but I love it! It so much fun to drive and keeping it in the lines on the road is a challenge but I now feel comfortable with Adam driving to and from work knowing he will make it home safe. Plus we can actually haul things again and help people move, and we no longer have to depend on my dad's truck for some things. Moving up in the world


So here is the new truck...name to come. Bye Bye Gary I miss you

Maternity is Over

So my beloved maternity clinical is officially over. And by no surprise I'm rather disappointed. Many people may be surprised or even hard to understand how someone can go from Construction to Nursing. Well folks for this girl it was all about babies! I have long wanted to be a mother and I love babies! Becoming a mom and having children is the only thing I ever wanted in my life. I love all children. If you ever need a babysitter I will do my darndest to help you out, most often for free just because I just want to spend time with kids. They facinate me, and I love looking at the world through a child's innocence.
So in deciding to go back to nursing school, I was looking forward to the Maternity rotation the most. And I have to say it didn't disapoint. I got to experience things that will stick with me for the rest of my life. While the didactic part of it didn't turn out that well (on average I was having to read 370 pgs each week with no instruction or lecture from a teacher..no wonder I didn't do all that well), but overall I have to say it has been the most facinating class I've taken. I'm honestly sad it's over :(
I had the most amazing intructor who was just simply wonderful and a wealth of knowledge. I'm so lucky to have had her as an instructor. She was awesome and I can't wait for her to finish her master's so she can be a full time professor. She will be AWESOME at it. I also feel blessed to have taken part in so many families as they started their families or added to them.
The only downside this clinical has broughten is it has given Adam and I baby fever REALLY bad. Mind you, he and I have had our baby names picked out since our first date...not joking...so this was a little rough on the homefront. I love my husband dearly but it almost breaks my heart when he says he wants to have a baby and I know my choices in life are the reasons we can't even try for one. I know that in the long run, this choice is for the good of our little family, but it's hard to focus on that, when you see all your friends and family getting to experience the one dream you've always wanted right now. But patience is a virtue and it's all a part of God's plan, so I just need to trust in it. It doesn't mean it doesn't suck for me, it just means I need practice in trusting it! Well Monday brings the Pediatric Clinical and I'm a little nervous about this one. The instructor seems like a drill sargent and that makes me nervous, hopefully she's worse on paper than in person!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Love Like Crazy

Ok so I'm obsessed with this song! I love it. It really helps put things in perspective! 

Love Like Crazy
Lee Brice


They called him crazy when they started out
Said seventeen's too young to know what loves about
They've been together fifty-eight years now
That’s crazy

He brought home sixty-seven bucks a week
He bought a little 2 bedroom house on Maple Street
Where she blessed him with six more mouths to feed
Yeah that’s crazy

Just ask him how he did it; he'll say pull up a seat
It'll only take a minute, to tell you everything
Be a best friend, tell the truth, and overuse I love you
Go to work, do your best, don't outsmart your common sense
Never let your prayin' knees get lazy
And love like crazy

They called him crazy when he quit his job
Said them home computers, boy they'll never take off
He sold his one man shop to Microsoft
They paid like crazy

Just ask him how he made it
He'll tell you faith and sweat
And the heart of a faithful woman,
Who never let him forget

Be a best friend, tell the truth, and overuse I love you
Go to work, do your best, don't outsmart your common sense
Never let your prayin knees get lazy
And love like crazy

Always treat your woman like a lady
Never get too old to call her baby
Never let your prayin knees get lazy
And love like crazy

They called him crazy when they started out
They've been together fifty-eight years now

Ain't that crazy?


Enjoy!

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Finally a Vaginal Birth!

So today was by far my favorite day of nursing school! I got to FINALLY see a vaginal delivery! But before I get to that I'll give some background on my day.
So for part of this one class I'm taking we were to go downtown and sit in on the Indiana State Board of Nursing. While this was a LOOOONG process and quite tedious at times, it was interesting to see how schools become accredited and how people can gain or loose their licenses.
After the INSB we had to meet at our campus site for a simulation on preeclampsia and post partum hemorrhage. These were designed to get us more comfortable in dealing with these not so fun parts of L&D. After our simulation, which went well by the way, we headed over to the hospital for another fun day in L&D.
I was put with the same nurse from last week, who was amazing! In fact her husband and I used to work for the same company (back in my construction days). But neither of us still work there. But she was awesome and I honestly think she should be an instructor because she was so nice and so informative it was great having her as my mentor. She helped me give my 1st and 2nd IV push drugs, along with my first in and out catheterization. I have witnessed both of these and practiced in the lab, but this was my first time actually doing either of these.
Our patient was amazing. She was so nice, her family was awesome, and they really made me comfortable in the room. We have to fill out all this BS paper work and some of it is kind of personal questions that I wouldn't want to talk about with anyone, but they made me feel comfortable with it, so it was awesome. But this was the lady's 9th pregnancy and would be her 6th baby. My instructor put me with her because she figured she would deliver quickly. Mrs. Mommy(I will refer to her as this for HIPPA reasons) came in already dilated to 7 cm so we thought it'd be a sure thing, since I still hadn't seen a vag birth. The ruptured her membranes(broke her water) and still 4.5 hrs later had made no progress. I was getting really upset about this because in the mean time 2 of my classmates were able to see vaginal births. I could almost not look at my classmates because I was on the verge of tears. And Mrs. Mommy was so sweet she was trying so hard and she was bound and determined to let me see my first vaginal delivery.
About 6:30 my instructor asked us if we wanted dinner, and I refused. I said "I'm staying put and I will stay after clinical if I have to because I am seeing this baby born!"
At around 7 I was ready and so was Mrs. Mommy to have this baby born. I was willing to pull out al the stops, or at least the ones I could. So I brought in our male classmate because he somehow seems to have the "magic touch" of just being in a room and the lady will dilate and begin pushing. And wouldn't your know it, within 2 minutes of him being in the room Mrs. Mommy started saying it was hurting really badly and wanted us to go get the nurse. After I got the nurse she was getting Mrs. Mommy comfortable and while she was comfortable we were all trying to guess when baby would be born. Mrs. Mommy's oldest daughter had guessed 7:25. Mind you at this point it was 7:05.
So Mrs. Mommy was getting really uncomfortable and was wanting to push, we had to tell her to slow down because we needed the doctor and NICU to be present (baby was a little premature). Once everyone got there Mrs. Mommy pushed for all of about 2 maybe 5 minutes tops and precious baby boy was born @ who would have guessed it...7:25! Way to go older sister!
Watching a baby being born naturally(ok with an epidural) is truly amazing! To begin to see the head come out and then the rest of the body is something I will never forget. Birth truly is one of God's miracles and I can't wait to experience it myself.
So mom and baby are doing great. Baby is one lucky little one to be a part of such a loving and wonderful family. They were so cute they even wanted a picture of me and the baby since they knew it was my first!!! Today is one for the history books for this full time student! I will never forget it!  Thanks for an amazing day! Now it's off to pull an all nighter for my exam tomorrow...Hopefully it goes well!

Post Partum

So yesterday was my second experience in Post Partum. I have to say that I enjoyed it much more yesterday than the time before. I don't know whether it was the patient or what but I enjoyed it much more. I had a patient who was hilarious, nice and very welcoming. My patient before was sort of stand offish which made it hard to learn. But I got more comfortable doing my mom and baby assessments. The mom had named her baby girl one of my favorite names, in fact I debated about naming Kacie it. But for HIPPA reasons I will not share.
Oh and the best part of the day was that mom had an almost 2 yr old son who was the cutest thing! He didn't know a stranger and was adorable! I just wanted to steal him away.
Since I was able to do my mom and baby assessments early I was in the nursery while our instructor was helping other students with their baby assessments and there was a baby just laying in his crib so I asked if I could just hold him, and they let me!!! I affectionately named him "baby zachary" I have no idea what his name was, it wasn't in the computer or on his crib, all they had was baby boy with the last name so I thought he looked like a zachary so I named him that haha! He was precious and it made my uterus hurt. I want a baby so bad I could scream!!!
But while I was enjoying holding my "baby zachary", the only guy in my clinical class was doing an assessment on another baby, and this baby had a dirty diaper so my classmate began to change the wet and dirty diaper. Well baby decided he would continue to poop and pee EVERYWHERE! The child almost needed a bath! Poor guy!(my classmate that is) but he handled it like a champ! His future wife will be so happy he can do that without gagging I'm sure! haha
Well now it's time to study for this stinking exam on friday. I could cry I'm so stressed out but I'm officially about 11 months from being done! WHOO HOO!!!  toodles!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

This Ain't Nothing

Ok so for my first music sharing post is a song by Craig Morgan called This Ain't Nothing. Its a song that made me cry the first time I listened to it, and I feel like it really puts things into perspective. I'm a pretty big Craig Morgan fan, his songs are fun and stupid and some just plain hilarious. Adam hates when I play some of his songs because they are just plain ridiculous but I have fun with it. So anyways, here are the lyrics to:


 This Ain't Nothing


 He was standing in the rubble of an old farmhouse outside Birmingham
When some on the scene reporter stuck a camera in the face of that old man
He said "tell the folks please mister, what are you gonna do
Now that this twister has taken all that's dear to you"
The old man just smiled and said "boy let me tell you something, this ain't nothing"

He said I lost my daddy, when I was eight years old,
That cave-in at the Kincaid mine left a big old hole,
And I lost my baby brother, my best friend and my left hand
In a no win situation in a place called Vietnam
And last year I watched my loving wife, of fifty years waste away and die
And I held her hand til her heart of gold stopped pumping,
So this ain't nothin'

He said I learned at an early age,
There's things that matter and there's things that don't
So if you're waiting here for me to cry,
I hate to disappoint you boy, but I won't
Then he reached down in the rubble and picked up a photograph
Wiped the dirt off of it with the hand that he still had
He put it to his lips and said man she was something
But this ain't nothin'

He said I lost my daddy, when I was eight years old,
That cave-in at the Kincaid mine left a big old hole,
And I lost my baby brother, my best friend and my left hand
In a no win situation in a place called Vietnam
And last year I watched my loving wife, of fifty years waste away and die
We were holding hands when her heart of gold stopped pumping
So this ain't nothin'

This ain't nothin' time won't erase
And this ain't nothin' money can't replace
He said you sit and watch your loving wife fifty years fighting for her life
Then you hold her hand til her heart of gold stops pumping
Yeah boy that's something,
So this ain't nothin'
No this ain't nothin'

Also here's a link to the video that had me balling!